Meaningful Self-Care: Following Jesus’ Example

If you’re like me, when you hear the phrase “self-care”, it brings pedicures, bubble baths, and a few extra minutes with a good book to mind. Or if it’s been awhile since you’ve seen friends, it might mean a girl’s night complete with wine and cheese. But so many of us seem conflicted about the time we spend indulging in activities that create a sense of relaxation or well-being. We associate it with the dreaded s-word. . . selfish. I know I sometimes do.

A good friend of mine routinely goes on retreats by herself. It’s an opportunity for her to get away with the Lord and recalibrate. She then returns to her busy, demanding schedule with a renewed sense of purpose, having had fruitful time with the Lord. And every time we talk about it, I say, “Gosh, I need to do that.”

Have I ever actually done it? No. Why? Because the truth is, every time I think about it I have to convince myself that it’s an okay thing to do.

Can you imagine if Jesus would have thought that taking time away with His father was selfish? Of course not. The Bible says that Jesus and the Father are one.

Jesus’ example of retreating in order to be close to a Father He was unified with should be a model for how we all live.

Surely He and the Father could have communicated in whatever way they wanted, at any time that they wanted. So, his coming away from the noise must have been for our benefit not His. Jesus was teaching us how to be human in relationship with the Father.

In the Book of John, Jesus says, “If anyone loves Me, he will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him.” (John 14:23)

Think of the magnitude of Jesus saying that He and His Father have made their home with us. Our world has gotten so loud, that often I can barely tend to the flesh and blood humans in my earthly home. It seems everything is vying for my attention. And our Lord shouldn’t have to compete.

Self-care can provide a needed opportunity for me to hear from the Lord without distraction.

As Christians we’re called to put others above ourselves and love our families well, so it wouldn't be right for us to indulge in self-care without thought of their needs. Questioning our motives here is good. But what’s also true is that we’re human. Humans being transformed into His image from glory to glory (2 Cor. 3:18). And yet on our way to glory, we travel through dark valleys in very fragile vessels.

These bodies of ours grow tired, weak, stressed, and literally sickened by the day to day of this life. Time-outs for self-care when taken with the appropriate heart posture, reflect a heart that knows its place: humble, broken, and in need of time with the Lord. Speaking to God as we sink into a warm tub at the end of a busy day becomes a praiseworthy event. And there isn’t an expert out there that won’t tell you how pivotal gratitude is to our mental health.

A posture of hearts bent low in gratitude while practicing self-care is worshipful.

Our self-care can provide a meaningful time-out to hear him or to engage in something that helps us rightly see His goodness. This can be as simple as buying ourselves a bouquet of flowers to remind us of His generosity and beauty or as highly planned as a retreat.

Coming away allows us to savor what is good in this life. And every good and perfect gift comes from Him.

Good self-care provides us an opportunity to praise our Lord for provision while in the middle of both the now and the not yet.